Example of poor writing about a place
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| This photo was taken when I was in junior high school. This is a camp in California. It was a school trip with my classmates from junior high school. This place is not only very famous for its tall trees, but also for its clean water. We ate many kinds of food on the trip. The camp served hot food all day. But for lunch we usually cooked food outside. The camp also provides fresh juice. It was so delicious. I recommend that you go to this camp and try the juice. Thank you! | |
Writing = 94 words Minimum is 80 words, so it is long enough. BUT ... | |
Questions: How much did you actually learn about this place? Does this photo teach us anything about this place? Could you find this place on the Internet or a map? What kind of camp is it? The text mentions "tall trees and clean watar," but where is this information in the photo? What kind of score do you think the teacher will give this student? | |